So, my senior film has officially received the green light from my concept development teacher!
This is a big deal. I have had this film in my head since I was in high school (which was awhile ago). My friend Monyee gave me a playlist of music, and there was this song on it, a beautiful little piano song, and I couldn't stop listening to it. I listened to it on loop. For days. And as I listened, this story emerged in my head. It has changed very little since then, and it has lingered, like a little itch in the back of my skull that wouldn't leave me alone. It's that little itch that made me want leave my old school and come to SCAD….
My first year at SCAD, I was gung-ho about the film. I really wanted to do it. But as quarters passed, I grew unsure about my skills and my idea. I began to think maybe it wasn't a good idea afterall. It was ambitious. There's a lot of run sequences. There's a lot of characters. The backgrounds are difficult cityscapes. The main protagonist is a teddy bear. A lost teddy bear. That felt cliche. How many times has that been done? Pooh, Corduroy, Paddington, Lotso…. so many teddy bears. Another student is even using a teddy bear in his senior film. But even with all these misgivings, I would mention the film sometimes to other students (usually in a "oh my god I want to make this film but I know I can't" kind of way). They all pretty much told me to go for it. But I just didn't feel like I could. Or should.
So, I came up with some other ideas and storyboarded them. They were okay. But during pitch time in class this week, where we broke into groups to pitch our ideas to one another, I decided to tell my group about my bear. I pulled up the music on my phone, set it down, let the music play and told the beats of the story over it. Like I have been doing for years. And everyone told me to do it. Everyone told me they could see the story in their heads, and that they loved the idea. That night, I sat down in the computer lab and began playing with storyboards. By the end of the night, my animatic was pretty much done, and I was in love with it. But I was also scared of it. I realized how hard it was going to be and I didn't know how to do it.
That was Tuesday. Yesterday, I decided to talk to my teacher about it. I sat down and did the same thing with him - put on the music, and told the story over it. No animatics, just story. When I was done, and after we'd discussed some of the beats and what shots would work well to enhance the story (alot of it him suggesting something and me going "I already drew it that way for the animatic"), I explained that the theme of the story was the idea that when one door closes, another door opens. When I said that, he stood up and told the whole class that my film was the first green light. I wasn't expecting that. I almost started crying, and I know I turned beat red. I just couldn't believe he liked it so much. This guy, who's worked on story for Blue Sky and Dreamworks, liked my idea right out of the starting gate. Not only that, he thinks I can do it. I'm just amazed.
We weren't sure about the name though. He thought "One Door Closes" would be good, but I didn't like it - it gave away the ending. While drawing concepts for the teddy bear protagonist, the title hit me so hard I started tearing up again.
Patches.
Not only is it going to be a visual theme in the film (the main character will have a patch, as well as being called Patch), but it's also a symbolic one - patching the hole in your heart, lost scraps of fabric coming together to form a warming quilt, that kind of concept. It's perfect. I hope my teacher likes it, because I ain't changing it.
I'm still scared. I'm scared of the inevitable criticism, and the pushes to change aspects of my story I don't want to change. I'm scared of the process, of crew members bailing, or not being able to find crew members at all. But I'm going to be stubborn about this, and I'm going to fight for what I want. Because too often have I given up on something before I even started because I was scared. This is my one chance to make this film, this film I've wanted to make for the last 7 years. This is my one and only chance to do this. To do something for me. And so I will. Or go crazy trying.
I'll be making a tumblr for the film, but I want the title to get the full green light before I commit to a link. I'm so excited you guys. I really think that this film will be amazing. And startling enough - I'm actually starting to think that maybe, just maybe, I can do it….
D